Monday, March 02, 2009

Sexy MoFu

Oh alright, alright! I get the picture.

Evidently, the 2 loyal friends who still check to see whether I roll any bones in this graveyard are getting weary of my silence (to know what I'm referring to, please check the comments of my last entry). Shawn and Jerome, your wishes are my pleasure, though it certainly wouldn't seem like I've taken much pleasure in blogging for quite some time now to the casual observer.

I am adjusting. Adjusting, and hopefully growing as a human being, and striving for "unflappability" in the face of life's challenges. And to put such lofty thoughts into written words seems arrogant and overblown. But that is indeed, what I've been working at over the past few months. Attitude adjustment... positive thinking... best-foot-forward... gratitude... kindness. It all takes surprisingly little effort once you make it the norm, and not the exception. Kind of like recycling... people bitch and moan about recycling, but really... there's no effort in it once it's routine.
At any rate, the biggest problem with these kind of goals, is the lack of tangible evidence that you've been up to anything at all. And perhaps I truly haven't been up to much else, except trying to maintain some semblance of real friendship amongst a list of 200 or so people on Facebook. I'm now, quite thoroughly convinced it's possible to do, though one does tend to wonder where their evenings and pretty-much all other spare time goes in the process.

That's why Facebook has been put in the freezer for the month of March. And, for all intent and purposes, I feel a little guilty blogging and thus living more of my life on the internet. Somewhere along the line I'll put a little more effort into "living" life, than simply talking about it online.

Without further ado... let my bullet some stuff I've been up to... all Facebook-style... or maybe even "Twitter"ish for those who can no longer stomach nasty things like paragraphs.

* I have been dating boys like a Mo-fo. (why is it Mo-fo, and not Mo-Fu??) (see!! that's something I'd put in a Facebook status update - I'm chronic.) Amidst those dates, I've met some pretty wonderful guys and some spectacularly uninteresting/incompatible suitors. I'm sure that happens to everyone once they put themselves on the market. (ie: Bear411.com) (nsfw)

* I have stopped taking my anti-depressants. For 2 weeks now, I have been med-free and enjoying the return of regular emotions to be felt at will and whimsy. No, they're not all the plum, "tickly" emotions. But that, as they say, is life... and I've had enough therapy and done enough reading to know which trains of thought are healthy and which are a complete waste of time and energy. (That doesn't mean I don't still board the wrong train, but I tend to not ride it as long as I once would have.)

* The boys (Cole and Porthos) are doing really well. I think they've adjusted quite nicely to the alternating weeks between my place and Ted's place. Let it never be said, these two animals aren't loved and cherished by their daddies. All of the anxiety they initially expressed during the transition, seems to have been eased as they've grown accustomed to the new routine.

* I bought black leather jeans. Hee hee They're mail-order from "International Male" clothing.
And I got them for 89-dollars. They still need hemming before I erase any remaining doubt about whether or not I'm gay to the remaining 2% of people exposed to me that might wonder. And no, they're not tacky or cheesy. They're loose-fit, casual and cute. I like 'em.

* I'm currently working my way through watching all 6 seasons of Oz. (Season 4 as we speak.) It's amazing how, cutting-edge and risque I once found this show - and within it's own rights, it still is, but HBO certainly got a whole lot racier. Perhaps Oz can be offered gratitude for paving the way. Sadly, as much as I'm enjoying it... ...it's slipping further into the realm of soap opera with a shank-of-the-week (that would be "murder within the prison" for all you penitentiary virgins) and much repetitive dialogue.

...and on that note. I think I'll watch another episode before bed.

Song of the day, in honour of Facebook, and the frickin' temperature outside, and my whole philosophy about living my life online. I leave you with the lyrics to "Freezer" by Supreme Beings of Leisure. Lush, chillax, trip-hop electronica for those who don't know who they are. : )


I live my life in a freezer
I live my life like millions of people
I left my heart in a freezer
I left my mind and I don't even know

And I've turned to stone
Yes I've turned to stone
And I've turned to stone
Left out alone

I left my thoughts in a freezer
I left my thoughts where nobody goes
I lost my soul in a freezer
I lost my heart where it's forty below

And I've turned to stone
Yes I've turned to stone

Too many fissures in the same stream
Went bitter living in a hazy dream
Too many voices make an ugly scream
They're crowning me, I cannot see
Why must it be
I'm in a freezer

Free me from the freezer (x4)

Cause I've turned to stone
Yes I've turned to stone
Well I've turned to stone
Left all alone

Too many fissures in the same stream
Went bitter living in a hazy dream
Too many voices make an ugly scream
They're crowning me, I cannot see
Why must it be
I'm in a freezer

And I must be stone
In the freezer

7 comments:

Misster Kitty said...

Well I don't feel the slightest bit guilty about pressuring you into a post, in fact I am glad to hear of all you HAVE been doing! Brava to that!
Sexy Leather Pants, Menz and just saying no to drugs! Allow me to be the first to say.
I'm proud of you! :-)

John said...

Awww. Thanks Shawn! :)

Jerome said...

You see, posting here is significantly less of a life-drain than Facebook, which is an ongoing, constantly changing beast. This is a few moments to write at the end of the day. Easy, right? Haha!

Nice to have you back.

As for Oz, I am also a watcher thereof. I've always said that if there were that many murders, I'm sure more people would be looking into it, but still, a decent show when all's said and done.

John said...

Facebook as a "life-drain"... how sadly apt. I enjoy it's ever-changing "beastiness" but not it's lack of depth.

Thank you for "caring" that I'm back friend. :)

And again, as for Oz... I sometimes wonder if there aren't very-well murders in such numbers that go largely unmentioned/uninvestigated since the prison population is so large. They have to get their facts for Augustus Hill from somewhere. (Well, I suppose they don't really. But he certainly sounds like he's quoting reliable sources.) ---speaking of Augustus... they never did pick up his storyline when he tried to escape in a casket from the morgue. Or at least they haven't yet.

John said...

To further the discussion about Oz, or just for my own sake... I watched 3 hours of Oz last night, and Said killed Adibisi - WTF!!! I had seen it before, but forgotten. The main characters are droppin' like flies! An yeah, Clair the hack... she's a disgusting sow. We hate her.

And HOLY! She's having sex'shul-r'lations with more inmates than you can shake a... well... you know... a stick at.
Eww. Eww. Eww. Bad, dirty, sow. Naughty pig-woman!

Kevin said...

i LOVE SBL!!! i saw them about 7 or 8 years ago in Montreal. lovelovelove them!

John said...

Yay! Another SBL fan! Do you have "11i"?

I hope we don't have to wait another billion years for a new album.