When a Basett Can't Take No More

Porthos had a very "Jackie Collins" moment last night. In a moment of doggie desperation... a cry for help... a last-ditch effort to command all of our attention... young Basett hit the pills.

No suicide note or nuffin'.


I joke about it now, but at the time he scared the shit out of us. You see, I had a chiropractic appointment last night and I called Ted to come and pick me up when I was done. Since we've been "testing the waters" for short periods with P-Dawg being out of the crate when we're not home, Ted left him in the care of Cole. It wasn't going to be a long stint, so no worries right? Well... Ted left his gym bag on the floor, and in the gym bag is a small Tylenol bottle with both Tylenol and Advil inside that Ted totes around with him. We came home to Pordiddly, poppin' pills. Specifically, the Advil with their irresistibly sweet coating. (Why is that anyhow? Does anyone actually prefer Advil for the taste?) "Why no dear puppy; those aren't M&M's".



By Ted's best estimate (based on how many pills he believed to be unaccounted for) Porthos had eaten at least 4, but no more than 6. Like we do in any after-hours canine health crisis, we hit the internet to find out whether we should be trying to get him to throw up, rushing him to a vet, etc, etc.
Luckily, it turns out, for a dog his size he would've needed to down a whole lot more than that to do any significant harm.


Little drama queen just had a headache.


Any how, he was fine and we were relieved. That dog is trouble. And here I had been griping that I was going to kill him if he'd been eating the plants again. Little fucker. Sometimes I wonder what Cole thinks of Porthos' impish behaviour. 'Cause he was never like that. Ah well. For all I know, Cole offered him some "candy". Above "eliminating the competition"? I think not.

I bought two new CD's last night (post chiropractor/pre-O.D. attempt). One was "Life in Cartoon Motion" by Mika, and the other was "Back to Black" by Amy Winehouse. And coke-head or not... Miss Amy just wails. I had no idea. She's astounding. Classic soul sound/2007 mentality. Knock me over with a feather. And knock her over with a Betty Ford brochure. Girlie likes her substances.

"Rehab" Amy Winehouse

They tried to make me go to rehab but I said 'no, no, no'
Yes I've been black but when I come back you'll know know know
I ain't got the time and if my daddy thinks I'm fine
He's tried to make me go to rehab but I won't go go go

I'd rather be at home with Ray
I ain't got seventeen days
Coz there's nothing
There's nothing you can teach me
That I can't learn from Mr Hathaway

I didn't get ol lucky at class
But I know it don't come in a shot glass

They tried to make me go to rehab but I said 'no, no, no'
Yes I've been black but when I come back you'll know know know
I ain't got the time and if my daddy thinks I'm fine
He's tried to make me go to rehab but I won't go go go

The man said 'why do you think you here'
I said 'I got no idea
I'm gonna, I'm gonna lose my baby so I always keep a bottle near'
He said 'I just think your depressed,
kiss me here baby and go rest'

They tried to make me go to rehab but I said 'no, no, no'
Yes I've been black but when I come back you'll know know know
I ain't got the time and if my daddy thinks I'm fine
He's tried to make me go to rehab but I won't go go go

I don't ever wanna drink again
I just ooh I just need a friend
I'm not gonna spend ten weeks
have everyone think I'm on the mend

It's not just my pride
It's just til these tears have dried

They tried to make me go to rehab but I said 'no, no, no'
Yes I've been black but when I come back you'll know know know
I ain't got the time and if my daddy thinks I'm fine
He's tried to make me go to rehab but I won't go go go